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Writer's pictureMaria Anya Paola P. Sanchez, OTRP

Can You Date Someone Who Does Not Share Your Political Beliefs?


That depends on what you mean by “date”. A date can simply mean a non-romantic appointment or fun activity with anyone. If that’s the case, then have as many dates as you want with people who will not harm you even if you have political differences. Doing so will expand your horizons. It can even inspire you to be a better person.


But romantic dating is different. Any boyfriend or girlfriend is a potential spouse. Having incompatible values will make it difficult for both of you to agree on what your lifestyles and child rearing practices should be. If you’ll separate, you, your ex, and your kids will suffer irreversible devastating consequences. So it’s best to date people whose character traits are aligned with your values. And a person’s political beliefs are a reflection of their character.


People might differ in their political choices because they’ve gathered contradicting information. This can be resolved through peaceful dialogue that can enlighten both parties and lead to strong relationships, even romantic ones. But some political differences are rooted in opposing worldviews, some of which form intolerable character traits. Below are two examples that illustrate this principle.



Case 1: Jejomar Binay’s Detractors


I voted for Jejomar Binay in the 2016 Philippine elections. I understand that others had valid reasons for voting for someone else. Unfortunately, many — not all — of those who vehemently opposed Binay were racist slanderers that struggled to logically think through important issues. A lot of his fellow Filipinos taunted him by saying that he’s ugly and nognog (nigger) instead of having a decent debate about his platform.


Moreover, they kept accusing him of crimes for which he has not been convicted. That’s slander! Can you imagine being married to a racist slanderer?



Case 2: Communists and Oligarchs


The few who tried to discuss Binay’s track record argued that it was the Ayalas who developed Makati, not Binay. So according to them, Makati’s prosperity does not reflect Binay’s capabilities.


Actually, it does. For conservatives and libertarians, the state’s primary role is to make it safe enough for private entities to thrive by fighting crime and making it efficient for them to conduct business. Binay did that, which enabled the Ayalas to build up Makati.


Binay wanted to make the Philippines prosper by reducing taxes and allowing greater foreign ownership. Who would oppose these? Why, the oligarchs and the communists, of course! When I say “oligarch”, I’m referring to wealthy business leaders who influence government policies to their favor through cronyism and other underhanded political means. Oligarchs benefit from higher taxes because they will kill off the small and medium enterprises (SMEs) that compete with them.


I know how difficult it is to run standalone therapy centers, which are SMEs. I've worked in them, and I've co-managed one. So I'm against policies that will tax them to death.


On the other hand, communist leaders want more taxes so that they will have all the money while the masses are languishing in poverty. Moreover, history has proven many times that communists are willing to censor, plunder, and massacre their own people. It’s the only way that their politicians can stay in power. Had our military and police force surrendered to the terrorist group New People’s Army, the Philippines might have had its own version of the Holodomor and the Great Leap Forward.


Despite such evils, a lot of Filipinos pride themselves over supporting the country’s Liberal Party (LP). LP nurtured the communists and protected the oligarchs through the 60%-40% rule on foreign ownership in the 1987 Constitution. Many LP supporters therefore erroneously think that their political choices are morally superior.



Who Wants a Self-Righteous Romantic Partner?


I know of kakampinks and yellows who have exemplary character traits. Besides, they are right to demand accountability from the Marcoses. Unfortunately, too many LP supporters are now resorting to communist-style shaming and censorship of their opponents, thinking that they are justified in doing so. The truth is that a lot of their political candidates have also enabled communist thieves and murderers. Thus, they have no moral high ground for cancelling anyone. Yet many are behaving like the rabid fanatics of Rodrigo Duterte, who’s a leftist too.


Take note that I said “many LP supporters”. That’s different from “all” and “most”.


So should you be romantically involved with someone who opposes your worldview? Definitely not. But we should still do our best to find common ground with each other. Doing so will help prevent societal collapse regardless of who will win this year’s elections. In fact, we can even be friends…but not if one is a self-righteous racist slanderer.



(Photo by Scott Broome)




1 Comment


Maria Evelyn Sanchez
Maria Evelyn Sanchez
Feb 16, 2022

As usual very refreshing courage.

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